Blessed...

...with a wonderful family!





I am in such bliss right now! What most parents take for granted I am cherishing.

You see when you have a child 15 weeks early you don't get to cuddle,kiss,love on them, you don't get to hear the cries, you don't get to change diapers, you don't get to bath or feed them naturally in the privacy of your home and you don't get to go home with them after giving birth instead you hear bells and ringing everyone is watching you, you have to pump your milk in a room that is the size of a closet, you see your child get poked throughout the day and getting fed through the multiply i.v.s they have. So that is why I love getting up just to look at Leah sometimes I cry because its hard to believe what a perfect little girl I have, her blue eyes look back at me and she smiles thats really all it takes from either of my kids a smile and all the hard times get pushed away. I am proud of my kids, Leah is a great baby she does cry and its ear piercing but I wouldn't trade it for the world. Jonathan he is my fighter and still is, he loves his ice cream, nacho cheese and sour cream, suckers and coke yes I know what a great mom I am! He has come so far and he is the king of smiles that loves to "walk" in his pony walker!
I have been going around the house lately just singing a song that sums everything up its called "Blessed" by Martina McBride I do thank God every night for all he has giving me! My kids are the best and I love them dearly

First haircut!

Jonathan got his first haircut a couple days ago! I didn't know how he would handle it but had a feeling he would be fine. Jonathan has no real sensory issues you can brush his hair, you can touch his mouth he even loves his teeth brushed1 I think the baby massage that I still continue almost every night has helped, he get a full body massage from head to toes with baby lotion and all, I think my turn is about up!
So Jonathan's Aunt Jessi cut his hair he did great smiling pretty much the whole time the only problem we really had was he didn't want to sit in his highchair actually he didn't want to sit period so instead he laid across my lap.

This past week my friend Jamie came over to give Jonathan a birthday gift and Leah got a beautiful outfit! Jonathan loves this gift its a dog named Scout from Vtech and you can program it to say your childs name, favorite color, favorite food and I am sure there is many more things it does but I was just as excited to play with it! Jonathan smiles and "talks" to his new "woof woof" he actually says ooff ooff which we know as woof woof!



Everything is going so great in our household, I thank God every night for this perfect family I have!

Leah is a month old!

Holy cow where does time go? Leah was a month old on the 4th! She is 7lbs 5ozs which is a lot considering she was 5.4lbs when she was born than came home at 5lbs so in a matter of 3 weeks she has managed to gain over 2lbs. I know I am crazy but I called the doctor to see if she was gaining to fast her response was first she laughed then she said its nearly impossible to overfeed a breastfed baby my response was but at night (and after every feed I pump because she doesn't empty my breast) my husband feeds her 120ml bottle(4oz) again she laughed and said there is only a handful of her parents that would even know what 120mls are she told me "Leah is a typical baby she is doing fine" now when I heard these words all I could think about is Jonathans NI nurse Kim, this was a typical response from her "everything will be fine" and it usually is, I must be a very paranoid parent but who can blame me! I spent 5 months in a hospital that is NOT normal! SO I must say Leah is doing everything a "typical" baby should. She is starting to get her days and nights in order which is very nice! She is so alert and looks around to find the face that is talking to her.
She did manage to get a blocked tear duct but so did Jonathan, a very easy thing to treat! We still have not ventured out so most of my family have not even met our little princess. We do go on car rides and she, like her brother love car rides!

My poor boy

So my last post was Jonathan was pretty much back to normal, well he wasn't he was still crying very uncomfortable and now having massive blowout that seemed black and tar looking. So back to the doctors to ask for a stool and urine sample. We turned it in saturday morning and by 9pm the doctor called us. She told me to sit down because his sample came back as a serious bacterial infection in the intestines, which was caused by his antibiotic(augmentin) he took for his ear infection 4 WEEKS ago! Apparently that antibiotic is very strong and took over all his good bacteria and he was left with only the bad bacteria. This explained his weight loss, which was 18 1/2lbs 2 weeks ago! Not wanting to eat because there was no room, and his bloody stool and crankiness. If this would not have been caught Jonathan would be in the hospital today trying to recover, I thank God for giving me insight on knowing to ask for a stool sample because it is VERY hard to know what is hurting on a kiddo that is non verbal! I continue to pray this is what was causing everything that has happened and there is anything else going on inside him, He is back to himself the last 4 days. He is very happy so happy he is belly rolling again and laughing which has been 4 weeks since we have seen a smile,
he is smiling at his sissy and trying to either grab her to say I love you or pushing her away to say o.k you can go now;) I love love love seeing the smiles the last 4 weeks have been very trying! Jonathan did see the doctor today and he was 19.15lbs so that is good. I thank you friends and family for all the prayers! Enjoy the new pics, don't you love his beautiful smile?!

My big 2 year old!

Seriously where does time go? My little man turned 2 years old yesterday and even though we didn't have a great big party we had fun. Jonathan is doing better he isn't 100% but hes 90% back to his norms. We are getting another blood draw today to check his liver it has been questionable the last two times so please pray everything turns out o.k today!
Jonathan LOVES to be out so we went for a drive stopped and got a frosty from Wendys, he loves these things! We went home and just celebrated the 6 of us, my dad and brother we're there too!
Its been trying the last couple weeks with a newborn and on top of that having Jonathan cry and not know what is wrong, so to say I am happy he is almost back to norm is an understatement! I really want to get him back in his pony walker but he is having nothing to do with it, oh well I have to give him time to get back in the groove of things. He really is not enjoying Leah, a lot of sibling rivalry! Whenever he sees me holding her he cries, if she cries he starts crying, he stares at her and wont even smile. He wants me all to himself which in a way makes me sad I want him to like Leah and I know its going to take time but its heartbreaking when I pick her up and he gives me those puppy dog eyes and tears are streaming down his face, he doesn't know why he is not getting 110% of my attention anymore. I have talked with a few micro preemie moms that have had a special needs child then another baby and said the transition was anywhere between 4 and 10 weeks till the older one got used to the idea of another sibling.
Even though its been two years I still miss my other little boy Preston he only lived a short while but I think of him everyday, I imagine what it would be like today with 2 toddlers running around and driving me crazy! I really wish I could have kept them in longer, I wish I could of kept them safe like Leah. I miss you and love you Preston and can't wait for the day we all meet again!
Jonathan, we love you and you are doing awesome with everything you are a very determined little boy, you set out and do things doctors said you wouldn't be able to do. You amaze us, you bring us so much joy your the love of our lives and can't wait to see what this coming year brings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Love those eyes!!!!

Some pictures of Leah

The bottom one is me, notice any resemblance?
Our first outing to the pediatrician

I Have only time now to post pics but will do an update later. Leah is a pretty easy baby she is up from 12 to 5am mostly eating, can you believe she is almost eating as much as Jonathan! Jonathan on the other hand is not doing so good I have been in tears a lot because hormones I'm sure but we are back to Jonathan crying day and night it all started about the time Leah came home! He is not eating so good he has actually lost a pound so of course dr. is worried but she agrees first thing we need to do is figure out why he is crying and upset! So please pray that Jonathan gets better soon!

LEAH MARIE

Leah Marie has arrived, 5 weeks early!
She was born at 35.1 weeks. Justin and I were aware that it was possible going to happen wednesday when I went for my nst tuesday. Leah looked great on the nst however I was requiring very little insulin to no insulin at all the last couple days. The doctors discussed that this was a sign the placenta could possible "shut down" in a couple days in which we would of had a stillbirth, very scary!!! So we went back for another nst on wednesday and the day before needed no insulin(my insulin requirements were 4 shots a day for a total of almost 200units, a lot) so that happened at 9am and we were sent down to labor and deliver to get prepared.I was very nervous but knew we made it a lot longer than 25 weeks and knew GOD was in complete control. At 341 pm little Miss Leah was born weighing at 5lbs 4ounces and crying on top of her lungs, only a micro mom would understand why I was crying and laughing at the same time it was music to our ears! She was 18 inches long and required NO NICU time we all came home this last saturday and will update more but for now this will do, I'm tired and its hectic around here!